A Vow...

Although it is not surprising to me that marriage is given little to no respect nowadays (what with our media, in particular), it does make me sad. I have watched, among people who view marriage incorrectly, one over-arching philosophy emerge: marriage is a "trap." Of course, I wouldn't expect people who aren't Christians to view marriage in any other way, but in reality, this view is gaining ground among believers as well.

So, why do people believe marriage is a trap? Pretty simple. They look to the media for their answers. Have you ever noticed how marriages are (largely) portrayed on the television and in movies? Tell me if this sounds familiar: a stupid, blundering husband is verbally beaten down by his over-worked, haggard housewife. Disrespectful kids run rampant in the home, complaining to both parents about their latest relationship, and nothing is ever solved without a huge fight. And then there are shows like Friends. Young, beautiful, single men and women have consequence-free sex, steady jobs, and friendships that last through anything; even sleeping around with each other. Which would you pick?

Of course most of the misconceptions about marriage have to do with one thing: sex. The reason that shows like Friends are so immediately successful is because they advertise great, guilt-free, disease-free sex, with endless and beautiful partners (something that is clearly NOT happening in most shows/movies that showcase a marriage). I will agree that sex is powerful, but I cannot support or adhere to the idiotic notion that marriage prevents a person from experiencing "all that life has to offer." Yet this belief is the main reason marriage is SO looked down upon today.

I could argue against that logic from many different positions, but there is really only one point to make: the media has it backwards. They have put sex in the position of power, ahead of marriage. Unfortunately, that cannot be true. Outside the Utopian bubble of shows and movies that sell sex as "completely without boundaries or consequences" there is an ugly reality. Sexually transmitted diseases are rampant, pornography is on the rise (along with rape and adultery), and men and women, as they grow older, are becomingly increasingly more dissatisfied and disillusioned with the "anything goes" lifestyle. Why? Because sex requires context.

Imagine if you were shown Mel Gibson's battle speech as William Wallace in Braveheart. Would it mean anything to you if you hadn't seen the rest of the film? Yes, that scene might be worth watching on its own, but it has none of its power without the entirety of the film to give it gravity or weight. It requires context in order to be worthwhile.

So it is with sex. Sex cannot mean anything unless it is fulfilled within the context God gave it: marriage. Marriage is a commitment to serve another person completely selflessly. It is God's gift to us, and it is meant to clearly demonstrate Christ's relationship to His bride: the Church. Sex within marriage, therefore, is an outpouring of love and a testament to the permanence and oneness of being husband and wife. Instead of being an entrapment, sex within marriage is totally freeing, because it allows a husband and wife to serve each other selflessly. And THAT is where its true power lies.

Without marriage to give it context, sex is purely carnal, and has nothing to do with a promise to serve another person. It is entirely selfish, and it is WHY men and women who have sex outside of marriage are left dissatisfied and disillusioned: it simply has no meaning.